Friday, August 26, 2005


Well, my soul-searching is doing me some good...a break, a breather from things, and have been thinking about my own future. Like what I want to do. I've come to realize over the past three years that i'm both right and left-brained, and I need to nurture both sides of me. Especially since I have been more anxious lately, and it's really my right brain that calms me down, as I'm one of those overly-analytical types. So I did crack last week and was all like, I need to study art. This is what I go through every time I crack. It's not so much the art, per se, or seeing peopel who've studied art and are workign at neat jobs, but it's more about peace of mind. It's also about pushing my artistic abilities to new heights and limits, and to see what i can do. I mean, I've regretted not taking more art, not focusing on my artistry. And I think that's part of the knitting and sewing, and the anxiety and hurt. It's a sense of belonging to a community where I feel like I fit in, and I think I fit in best with creative souls. And the people I hung out with last week--they were happy. And I was like, I want to be sure I'm doing what makes me happy. Even if I do end up working in my field, but work on design and jewelry on the side, and that makes me happy, so be it. If the jewelry thing becomes a career, so be it. I just have to nurture both parts.

So my plan: take a few art classes this fall on Saturdays if I can. Take more next year, too. Perhaps find a part-time job after graduation, and take some art courses, figure out what I want, because I don't want to regret having not taken a chance.

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